Growing up with an Asian mom and white dad meant that my mom’s colorful Southeast Asian traditions were forced to mix with my dad’s bland, stereotypical “mainstream American” traditions, painting an oddly charming picture of a 16-year-old “wasian” girl’s childhood. 

Much of my childhood was spent at my grandparents’ house, and being Vietnamese immigrants meant that almost everything I experienced with them was culturally traditional Vietnamese, despite their countless efforts to “Americanize” themselves. None of these efforts were successful, and I am eternally grateful that they failed, as I can always count on traditional Vietnamese food being laid out on the table whenever I visit and the comforting sounds of their native language in the background. 

My father grew up in a small town in East Texas, the culture in Texas is bold, and I am more than happy to embrace those bold, hospitable, big country traditions as well. 

The school itself is embellished with so much beautiful diversity and cultural blending from every region of the world, which is what makes our school as unique as it is. Paloma MacDougall (11), a representative student of cultural mixing, prides herself on displaying her quarter Japanese, three-quarters Eastern European and multi-religious mix. 

“There is definitely a religious divide in my family,” Macdougall said. “I’ve grown up celebrating both Jewish and Christian holidays, even though I’m personally Catholic, since my dad is Catholic. My mom, though, is a non-practicing Jew.”

Regarding cultural traditions, growing up half Asian meant that much of what my mom experienced in her childhood bleeds into what I experience now, like going to Buddhist temples for family gatherings, rarely ever having a turkey at Thanksgiving and childhood norms where most of the family sits down for dinner together every night, just like on Macdougall’s.

“My dad, half Japanese, grew up eating rice with every single meal, no matter what was being made that night,” Macdougall said. “Even though my mom isn’t a practicing Jew anymore, my family still enjoys celebrating major holidays and showing our appreciation for the religion, so we typically eat traditional Jewish foods on those holidays.”

Inevitably, different cultural norms and societal standards impact how each person is brought up, and for Macdougall, those cultural differences are very different for her parents, just as they are for many culturally mixed people.

“Since my dad grew up in Japan, he definitely has more strict and protective standards for me, while my mom is more easy-going because that’s the way she grew up here in San Diego,” Macdougall said.

My parents tend to have similar practices, with my mom being the strict one, holding strong Asian values, and my dad certainly being the more laid-back one because of the few restrictions he had growing up. My mom was constantly forced to perform well and pursue success to honor her culture, which is why she teaches me much of her work ethic. It is not uncommon for Asian cultures to overly push success onto their children and glorify education.

On the other hand, some culturally mixed people are not as involved with their heritage as others. Nehemie McDade-Miranda (12) is a mix of Native American and Filipino, with her name coming from her mother’s Native American roots. Yet, McDade-Miranda and her family, despite being tremendously proud of their heritage, do not greatly prioritize their culturally rooted traditions.

“We go to Powows very occasionally to celebrate my Native American side, but my Filipino side isn’t celebrated a lot either,” McDade-Miranda said. “I guess my family grew up culturally mixed, but didn’t really ever push it on my or my siblings to overly immerse us in our heritage.”

Her family values pursuing individual passions, and her cultural mix did not greatly show in her upbringing or current life as much as it does in other mixed families. 

For my family, my dad does not prioritize his culture as much as he does my mom’s culture, which he was involved in for as long as they were together. Their wedding took place in a small Buddhist temple in Los Angeles, not because my mom is or was a practicing Buddhist, but because the comfort that the religion has provided her since childhood was something that she felt should be shared with my dad. That is why my dad is so proud to embrace Asian culture as a whole and encourages both my younger sister and I to do the same.

Whether that be attending Têt New Year’s festivals in Mira Mesa or eating Vietnamese food every weekend in Convoy, my family always found a way to remind my sister and I to be proud of our heritage and never let anyone take that away from us.